Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Mast PJ

Pichle saal ki baat hai..


There was a movie released called "GAVASKAR" in Australia .. Apna Sunil Gavaskar felt very proud about it. He went personally to watch the movie and check out how his image was portrayed in the movie. Movie chaalu ho gayi ... interval tak Gavaskar ka koi
naamonishaan nahi.. then Gavaskar thought movie me asli actor interval ke baad hi aata hai . But the bad part is movie got over and no Gavaskar found. Gavaskar got wild and he decided to sue the movie producers & directors.

He asked "Gavaskar naam ki movie banayi aur mere baare me kuch bhi nahi aisa kyon kiya ??"
then he got a reply and after hearing that he got silent and came back home in India ......
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"Tumne bhi to BORDER movie banayi lekin Allan Border ke baare me kuch bataya kya ??"

Funny Movie.....ENJOY

http://www.happydent.in/protex/viral/index.html

Sundar Kavita

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

WE ALL DO THIS !!!!

A woman went boating one Sunday taking with her some cans of coke which she put into the refrigerator of the boat. On Monday she was taken to the hospital and placed in the Intensive Care Unit. She died on Wednesday. The autopsy concluded she died of Leptospirosis. This was traced to the can of coke she drank from, not using a glass. Tests showed that the can was infected by dried rat urine and hence the disease Leptospirosis. Rat urine contains toxic and deadly substances It is highly recommended to thoroughly wash the upper part of soda cans before drinking out of them. The cans are typically stocked in warehouses and transported straight to the shops without being cleaned. A study at NYCU showed that the tops of soda cans are more contaminated than public toilets (i .e.) full of germs and bacteria. So wash them with water before putting them to the mouth to avoid any kind of fatal accident. Please forward this message to all the people you care about. (I JUST DID!)



Moral


A junior Software engineer, a senior Software engineer and their PM are on their way to a meeting. On their way through a park, they come across a wonder lamp.They rub the lamp and a ghost appears. The ghost says, "Normally, one is granted three wishes but as you are three, I will allow one wish each".

So the eager Junior Software engineer shouted, I want the first wish. I want to be in the Bahamas, on a fast boat and have no worries."Pfufffff, and he was gone.

Now the Senior Software engineer could not keep quiet and shouted " I want to be in Florida with beautiful girls, plenty of food and cocktails."Pfufffff, and he was also gone.

The PM calmly said," I want these two idiots back in the office after lunch at 2.00pm"

Moral of the story is: Always allow the bosses to speak first"!!!!

Monday, May 26, 2008

Flowers




Friday, May 23, 2008

Sardar Again

* Lady Doc: Tum roz subah clinic ke bahar khade kar auraton ko kyon
ghoorte ho?
Santa: Ji aap hi ne bahar likha hai: mahilaon ko dekhne ka samay 9am-
11am

* A man to Santa: Aao ji chess khediye.
Santa: Tu chal mein sports shoe paa ke hune aaya.


* At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I hv lst my
hand, oh!
Santa: Control urself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head.
Is he crying?

* In an interview,
Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Santa: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr.....
Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
Santa: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup...

* Santa was getting bitten by mosquitoes the whole night. He got
irritated... drank poison & said, Ab kaato saalon, sab maroge!

* Captain of Military: Naujawanon aage bado
Santa aage nahin bada
Captain: Tum aage kyun nahin bade?
Santa: Apne kaha 9 jawanon aage bado, mein 10ve number pe tha

* Santa apni khoobsurat Bibi k saath car mein baitha. Driver ne
sheesha set kiya. Santa gusse mein bola, meri bibi ko dekhkta hai,
piche baith, car mein chalaoonga!

Goood Morning


Always remember to forget
The things that made you sad
But never forget to remember
The things that made you glad.


Always remember to forget
The friends that proved untrue.
But don't forget to remember
Those that have stuck by you.


Always remember to forget
The troubles that have passed away.
But never forget to remember
The blessings that come each day.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Software Engineer !!!

There was a good old barber . One day a florist goes to him for a haircut. After the cut, he goes to pay the barber
and the barber replies : I am sorry, I cannot accept money from you; I am doing a Community Service.

Florist is happy and leaves the shop.

The next morning when the Barber goes to open his shop, there is a "Thank You" Card and a dozen roses waiting at his door.

A Confectioner goes for a haircut and he also goes to pay the barber he again refuses to take the money. The Confectioner is happy and leaves the shop.

The next morning when the Barber goes to open his shop, there is another "Thank you" Card and a dozen Cakes waiting at his door.

A Software Engineer goes for a haircut and he also goes to pay the barber again refuses the money saying that it was a community service.

The next morning when the Barber goes to open his shop, guess what he finds there......

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A Dozen Software engineers waiting for a free haircut... with Printouts of forwarded mail mentioning about free haircut!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BOLO SOFTWARE ENGINEER KI JAY

Sardar of the Day

Good site for surfing Pune

Chk this link:

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

YESTERDAY, TODAY AND TOMORROW

There are two days in every week about which we should not worry.
Two days which should be kept free from fear and apprehension.

One of these days is yesterday with its mistakes and cares,
Its faults and blunders, Its aches and pains.
Yesterday has passed forever beyond our control.
All the money in the world cannot bring back yesterday.
We cannot undo a single act we performed.
We cannot erase a single word we said. Yesterday is gone.

The other day we should not worry about is tomorrow.
With its possible adversities, Its burdens,
Its large promise and poor performance.
Tomorrow is also beyond our immediate control.
Tomorrow's Sun will rise, either in splendor or behind a mask of clouds, but it will rise.
Until it does, we have no stake in tomorrow, for it is yet unborn.
This just leaves only one day . . . Today.
Any person can fight the battles of just one day.
It is only when you and I add the burdens of those two awful eternity's - yesterday and tomorrow that we break down.
It is not the experience of today that drives people mad.
It is the remorse or bitterness for something which happened yesterday and the dread of what tomorrow may bring.

Let us therefore live but one day at a time Laughing

Love Story of Narayana Murthy and Sudha

From Sudha's Autobiography



It was in Pune that I met Narayan Murty through my friend Prasanna who is now the Wipro chief, who was also training in Telco. Most of the books that Prasanna lent me had Murty's name on them which meant that I had a preconceived image of the man.

Contrary to expectation, Murty was shy,bespectacled and an introvert. When he invited us for dinner .. I was a bit taken aback as I thought the young man was making a very fast move. I refused since I was the only girl in the group. But Murty was relentless and we all decided to meet for dinner the next day at 7.30 p.m. at Green Fields hotel on the Main Road,Pune.

The next day I went there at 7' o clock since I had to go to the tailor near the hotel. And what do I see?

Mr. Murty waiting in front of the hotel and it was only seven. Till today, Murty maintains that I had mentioned (consciously!) that I would be going to the tailor at 7 so that I could meet him...And I maintain that I did not say any such thing consciously or unconsciously because I did not think of Murty as anything other than a friend at that stage. We have agreed to disagree on this matter.

Soon, we became friends. Our conversations were filled with Murty's experiences abroad and the books that he has read. My friends insisted that Murty was trying to impress me because he was interested in me. I kept denying it till one fine day, after dinner Murty said, I want to tell you something. I knew this was it. It was coming.

He said, I am 5'4" tall. I come from a lower middle class family. I can never become rich in my life and I can never give you any riches. You are beautiful, bright, and intelligent and you can get anyone you want. But will you marry me? I asked Murty to give me some time for an answer. My father didn't want me to marry a wannabe politician,(a communist at that) who didn't have a steady job and wanted to build an orphanage...

When I went to Hubli I told my parents about Murty and his proposal. My mother was positive since Murty was also from Karnataka, seemed intelligent and comes from a good family. But my father asked: What's his job, his salary, his qualifications etc? Murty was working as a research assistant and was earning less than me.

He was willing to go dutch with me on our outings. My parents agreed to meet Murty in Pune on a particular day at10 a. m sharp. Murty did not turn up. How can I trust a man to take care of my daughter if he cannot keep an appointment, asked my father.

At 12noon Murty turned up in a bright red shirt! He had gone on work to Bombay, was stuck in a traffic jam on the ghats, so he hired a taxi(though it was very expensive for him) to meet his would-be father-in-law.

Father was unimpressed. My father asked him what he wanted to become in life. Murty said he wanted to become a politician in the communist party and wanted to open an orphanage. My father gave his verdict. NO.
I don't want my daughter to marry somebody who wants to become a communist and then open an orphanage when he himself didn't have money to support his family.

Ironically, today, I have opened many orphanages something, which Murty wanted to do 25 years ago. By this time I realized I had developed a liking towards Murty which could only be termed as love. I wanted to marry Murty because he is an honest man. He proposed to me highlighting the negatives in his life. I promised my father that I will not marry Murty without his blessings though at the same time, I cannot marry anybody else. My father said he would agree if Murty promised to take up a steady job. But Murty refused saying he will not do things in life because somebody wanted him to. So, I was caught between the two most
important people in my life.

The stalemate continued for three years during which our courtship took us to every restaurant and cinema hall in Pune. In those days, Murty was always broke. Moreover, he didn't earn much to manage. Ironically today, he manages Infosys Technologies Ltd., one of the world's most reputed companies. He always owed me money. We used to go for dinner and he would say, I don't have money with me, you pay my share, I will return it to you later.

For three years I maintained a book on Murty's debt to me.. No, he never returned the money and I finally tore it up after my
wedding. The amount was a little over Rs 4000. During this interim period Murty quit his job as research assistant and started his own software business. Now, I had to pay his salary too! Towards the late 70s computers were entering India in a big way.

During the fag end of 1977 Murty decided to take up a job as General Manager at Patni Computers in Bombay. But before he joined the company he wanted to marry me since he was to go on training to the US after joining. My father gave in as he was happy Murty had a decent job, now.

WE WERE MARRIED IN MURTY'S HOUSE IN BANGALORE ON FEBRUARY 10, 1978 WITH ONLY OUR TWO FAMILIES PRESENT.I GOT MY FIRST SILK SARI. THE WEDDING EXPENSES CAME TO ONLY RS 800 (US $17) WITH MURTY AND I POOLING IN RS 400 EACH.



I went to the US with Murty after marriage. Murty encouraged me to see America on my own because I loved travelling. I toured America for three months on backpack and had interesting experiences which will remain freshin my mind forever. Like the time when the New York police took me into custody because they thought I was an Italian trafficking drugs in Harlem.

Or the time when I spent the night at the bottom of the Grand Canyon with an old couple. Murty panicked because he couldn't get a response from my hotel room even at midnight. He thought I was either killed or kidnapped.


IN 1981 MURTY WANTED TO START INFOSYS. HE HAD A VISION AND ZERO CAPITAL...initially I was very apprehensive about Murty getting into business. We did not have any business background.. Moreover we were living a comfortable life in Bombay with a regular pay check and I didn't want to rock the boat. But Murty was passionate about creating good quality software. I decided to support him.

Typical of Murty , he just had a dream and no money. So I gave him Rs 10,000 which I had saved for a rainy day, without his knowledge and told him, This is all I have . Take it. I give you three years sabbatical leave. I will take care of the financial needs of our house. You go and chase your dreams without any worry. But you have only three years!


Murty and his six colleagues started Infosys in 1981,with enormous interest and hard work. In 1982 I left Telco and moved to Pune with Murty. We bought a small house on loan which also became the Infosys office. I was a clerk-cum-cook-cum-programmer.

I also took up a job as Senior Systems Analyst with Walchand group of Industries to support the house. In 1983 Infosys got their first client , MICO, in Bangalore. Murty moved to Bangalore and stayed with his mother while I went to Hubli to deliver my second child, Rohan. Ten days after my son was born, Murty left for the US on project work.

I saw him only after a year, as I was unable to join Murty in the US because my son had infantile eczema, an allergy to vaccinations. So for more than a year I did not step outside our home for fear of my son contracting an infection. It was only after Rohan got all his vaccinations that I came to Bangalore where we rented a small house in Jayanagar and rented another house as Infosys headquarters.

My father presented Murty a scooter to commute. I once again became a cook, programmer, clerk, secretary, office assistant et al. Nandan Nilekani (MD of Infosys) and his wife Rohini stayed with us. While Rohini babysat my son, I wrote programs for Infosys. There was no car, no phone, and just two kids and a bunch of us working hard, juggling our lives and having fun while Infosys was taking shape. It was not only me but also the wives of other partners too who gave their unstinted support. We all knew that our men were trying to build something good.

It was like a big joint family,taking care and looking out for one another. I still remember Sudha Gopalakrishna looking after my daughter Akshata with all care and love while Kumari Shibulal cooked for all of us. Murty made it very clear that it would either be me or him working at Infosys. Never the two of us together ... I was involved with Infosys initially.

Nandan Nilekani suggested I should be on the Board but Murty said he did not want a husband and wife team at Infosys. I was shocked since I had the relevant experience and technical qualifications.

He said, Sudha if you want to work with Infosys, I will withdraw, happily. I was pained to know that I will not be involved in the company my husband was building and that I would have to give up a job that I am qualified to do and love doing.

It took me a couple of days to grasp the reason behind Murty's request.. I realized that to make Infosys a success one had to give one's 100 percent. One had to be focussed on it alone with no other distractions. If the two of us had to give 100 percent to Infosys then what would happen to our home and our children? One of us had to take care of our home while the other took care of Infosys.


I opted to be a homemaker, after all Infosys was Murty's dream. It was a big sacrificebut it was one that had to be made. Even today, Murty says, Sudha, I stepped on your career to make mine. You are responsible for my success.

I might have given up my career for my husband's sake.But that does not make me a doormat....

Sardar Again

* Girl: Will u marry me?
Santa: No, humare yahan shaadi sirf relatives mein hi hoti hai. Mummy
ne Papa se, Didi ne Jijaji se aur Bhaiya ne Bhabhi se

* Banta: Yeh chaaku kyon ubaal rahe ho?
Santa: Suicide karne ke liye
Banta: To phir ubalne kui kya zaroorat hai?
Santa: Kahin infection na ho jaaye

* Santa & Banta were going with their friend on one scooter & a
traffic cop tried to stop them.
Santa said: Sorry bhaji, already 3 baithe hain bilkul bhi jagah nahin
hai

* Santa: Today is Sunday & I wanna njoy, so I bought 3 movie tickets
Jeeto: Why 3?
Santa: For u n ur parents

* Banta: Y do u take ur wife only to night clubs?
Santa: By the time she gets ready no other place is open

* Museum Administrator: That's a 500 year old statue u've broken.
Banta: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Too Good

स्पेनिश नौसेना के एक युध्दपोत का कप्तान एक दिन डेक पर टहल रहा था कि तभी उसका सहायक भागता हुआ आया और चिल्लाया - सर ! मैंने अभी अभी दुश्मन का एक युध्दपोत देखा है जो हमारी तरफ आ रहा है ।

कप्तान ने शांतिपूर्वक उसकी बात सुनी, फिर उसे आदेश दिया - जाओ, मेरी लाल कमीज लेकर आओ ।

सहायक उसकी लाल रंग की कमीज ले आया जिसे कप्तान ने पहन लिया।

दोनों जलपोतों के बीच भयंकर युध्द हुआ और अंत में स्पेनिश पोत विजयी रहा। युध्द के बाद, सहायक ने कप्तान से पूछा - सर! मैं आपसे एक बात पूछना चाहता था! आपने युध्द के दौरान लाल रंग की कमीज क्यों पहनी ?

कप्तान ने गर्व भरे ढंग से बताया - ताकि यदि मुझे गोली लगे तो मेरे सैनिक मेरे शरीर से बहता हुआ खून न देख सकें और उनका हौसला न टूटे।

सहायक अपने कप्तान की बहादुरी और बुध्दिमत्ता का कायल हो गया। तभी एक दूसरा सिपाही भागता हुआ आया और बोला - सर, सर ! मैंने अभी दुश्मन के 20 युध्दपोत देखे हैं जो हमारी तरफ आ रहे हैं !

कप्तान, सहायक की ओर मुड़ा और आदेश दिया - जाओ और जाकर मेरी पीले रंग की पेन्ट लेकर आओ.....।

Good Morning



IPL toons







TWO OPPOSITE SUICIDES...

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Born Brave

Love & Marriage

A student asks a teacher, "What is love?"


The teacher said, "in order to answer your question, go to the wheat field and choose the biggest wheat and come back.
But the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick."
The student went to the field, go thru first row, he saw one big wheat, but he wonders....may be there is a bigger one later.
Then he saw another bigger one... but may be there is an even bigger one waiting for him.
Later, when he finished more than half of the wheat field, he start to realize that the wheat is not as big as the previous one he saw, he know he has missed the biggest one, and he regretted.
So, he ended up went back to the teacher with empty hand.
The teacher told him, "...this is love... you keep looking for a better one, but when later you realise, you have already miss the person.... "



*"What is marriage then?" the student asked.

The teacher said, "in order to answer your question, go to the corn field and choose the biggest corn and come back.

But the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick."
The student went to the corn field, this time he is careful not to repeat the previous mistake, when he reach the middle of the field, he has picked one medium corn that he feel satisfy, and come back to the teacher.
The teacher told him, "this time you bring back a corn.... you look for one that is just nice, and you have faith and believe this is the best one you get.... this is marriage."*

Classic Deadlock

Boss to secretary: For a week we will go abroad,
so make arrangements.

Secretary makes call to Husband: For a week my boss and
I will be going abroad, you look after yourself.

Husband make call to his secret lover: My wife is going
abroad for a week, so lets spend the week together.

The Secret lover makes call to small boy to whom she is giving
private tution: I have work for a week, so you need
not come for class.

Small boy make call to his grandfather: Grandpa, for a
week I don't have class 'coz my teacher is busy. Lets
spend the week together.

Grandpa make call to his secretary: This week I am
spending my time with my grandson. We cannot attend
that meeting.

Secretary make call to her husband: This week my boss
has some work, we cancelled our trip.

Husband make call to secret lover: We cannot spend
this week together, my wife has cancelled her trip.

Secret lover make call to small boy whom she is giving
private tution: This week we will have class as usual.

Small boy make call to his grandfather: Grandpa, my
teacher said this week I have to attend class. Sorry I
can't give you company.

Grandpa make call to his secretary: Don't worry ....this week
we will attend that meeting, so make arrangement ...........

JJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJ

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Height of Cost cutting

Sardarji's Mom's Letter To Canada Wala Son

Dear Banta Vahe Guru !

I am in a well here and hoping you are in the same well there. I'm writing

this letter slowly, because I know you cannot read fast.

We don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the

newspaper that most accidents happen 20 miles from home, so we moved 20

miles.

I wont be able to send the address as the last Sardar who stayed here took

the house numbers with them for their new house so they would not have to

change their address. Hopefully by next week we will be able to bring our

earlier address plate here, so that our address will remain same too.

This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine, situated right

above the commode. I'm not sure it works. Last week I put in 3 shirts,

pulled the chain and haven't seen them since.

The weather here isn't too bad. It rained only twice last week. The first

time it rained for 3 days and second time for 4 days.

The coat you wanted me to send you, your Aunt said it would be a little too

heavy to send in the mail with all the metal buttons, so we cut them off

and put them in the pocket.

Your father has another job. He has 500 men under him. He is cutting the

grass at the cemetery.

By the way I took Bahu to our club's poolside. The manager is really

badmash. He told her that two-piece swimming suit is not allowed in this

club. We were confused as to which piece should we remove?

Your sister had a baby this morning. I haven't found out whether it is a

girl or a boy, so I don't know whether you are an Aunt or Uncle.

Your uncle, Jetinder fell in a nearby well. Some men tried to pull him out,

but he fought them off bravely and drowned. We cremated him and he burned

for three days.

Your best friend, Balwinder, is no more. He died trying to fulfill his

father's last wishes. His father had wished to be buried at sea after he

died. And your friend died while in the process of digging a grave for his

father.

There isn't much more news this time. Nothing much has happened.

P.S: Beta, I was going to send you some money but by the time I realized, I

had already sealed off this letter.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Good Morning



Life gives Answers in Three ways,

It says YES and gives Whatever u Want,

It says NO and gives u Something Better

It says Wait and gives u the Best

"Don't just Dream. Live your Dream."